Time Tells All

It's a known fact that time tells all. This is a lesson that was so hard for me to believe, and ultimately learn.

Over time, things become so much clearer. You open your mind up to new ideas (hopefully). You allow yourself to think more creatively. You realize how short life can be, and over time, you realize that actions speak louder than words.

There was a moment the other day when I realized who was in my life for show, out of convenience, and because they actually cared about me. It came at a point where I was very vulnerable: and thats when you know. Its when you are vulnerable, and your friends help you. They nurse you back to your normal self. They don't judge you during this process, they are just there for you, holding your hand the whole way. I am forever grateful for these friends, but they weren't always around.

There is a phrase I truely believe in: People are in your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. It took years to sift through the hundreds of relationships I had to find the ones who I wanted in my life for life. Once you identify these people, your life feels a whole lot more fulfilling, or at least mine did, because you can spend your time accordingly and know it isn't a waste of time.

It is so easy to get caught up with the daily grind of life - from school, to boyfriends, to family, to work - to forget how important it is to nuture the existing important relationships within your life. If you don't take care of them, trust me - they will shrivel up and die. It's not a fun feeling when a person you were once close to asks you to spend time, and you realize you don't want to waste the precious time you have on them anymore: because it's not worth it.

Then there are those moments when you are trying to allocate your time between multiple people and a certain person feels neglected over another. Perfect example: the boyfriend and the best friend. When you spend alot of time with your boyfriend, the best friend sometimes feels neglected... and vice versa. I've witnessed this first hand with many of the people in my life and the relationships they share together. Balance is key. Life is like a diet, you must balance your diet to stay healthy, just like you have to balance your relationships.

It is possible though, that one of the people you are involved with, has unrealistic expectations and demands an unreasonable amount of time from you which clearly makes you unbalanced. It isn't fair, and it is up to an individual who is the wrong to recognize this unbalanced, selfish behavior and act accordingly. Continue with your balance, because it is part of the process of finding out who is worth keeping in your life. If they are worth it, they will recognize this important balance you have created for yourself, and will adjust. If not, see ya later!!

Sometimes the people worth nurturing cannot be easily identified, like I said, it took me years. Long, hard years filled with fights, tears, laughs, backstabbing, and everything in between. And I wasted alot of time. But that is part of the life process... if life were easy, what would be the point?
At 22, I have alot more lessons to learn... but if I just make someone else's life a little less complicated by opening their mind to some of the concepts I'm sharing and allow them to feel ok within their everyday actions and their allocation of time with the relationships they have, then I will be happy.

Find out who your "true" friends are, I promise, you'll feel alot more secure with yourself as a person!

Xoxo,
Carlene

PS: A countrylove reference that I just can't help but sneak into this post... a very relevant song: "You Find Out Who Your Friends Are" by Tracy Lawrence :-)